Joke about the thief 4

1 A man is very like parrots,one day he pass by a shop there was auctioning a parrot,he found the parrot have very beautiful feather ,so he said:"I 'd like pay 10 dollars on this parrot!" but there is a voice said :"I 'd like 20 dollars! “ the man is very like this parrot so he said immediately :"30 dollars."|but the other voice look like to against him ,it said all the time until the man said 200 dollars,the man is very happy for bought the parrot ,but he thought : I pay a lot of money on it ,but I will lost the money if it can't say any words, so he asked the boss:"Can the parrot speak some words?"
But after he said ,the parrot shouted angrily :" Who was haggle over price with you if I can't speaking?!"

2 There is a old woman in the psychiatric hospital,she crouched in the side of the door , wear in a black clothes and take an black umbrella ,the doctor thought:I must understand her before treat .so he also wear a black clothes and take a black umbrella ,crouched in the side of the door with the old woman,they don't say to each other,then a month passed,the old woman said :"May I asked ...are you a mushroom yet ?"

3 A physical teacher said:"the male student stand in my right,and the females stand in my left ,others don't move please,at last ,we found only the teacher didn't move.

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12 Points Make Your Home Secure

The following list offers some inexpensive ways to make your home secure:

1--Do not leave a ladder outside of your home. A thief could easily, and they do, gain entrance to a second story window.

2--Always ask for ID when service men come to your home. Do not let your children answer the door. Don't be afraid to call the company for verification BEFORE you let them inside your home.

3--Do not keep excess cash around your house. Keep it in a safety deposit box at your bank. If you must keep cash at home, hide it NOT in the kitchen or your bedroom, as that is the first place a thief will look.

4--Take pictures of your heirlooms and personal items for identification at some later time.

5--Mark all electronic equipment with a permanent etching of your name and drivers license number or social security number. This process makes it hard for the thief to sell your property, and easy for you to identify and get returned to you.

6-- Never leave notes on your front door announcing your absence. This may seem incredible, but people do this all of the time. You might as well put up a neon sign giving your time of return also.

7-- Keep an eye out for a strange vehicle on your block. It could be a thief checking out the where abouts of you or your neighbors. Write down the vehicle description and the license number. Don't be ashamed to call the Police to report a suspicious vehicle.

8-- Purchase a timer that will turn on your lights automatically and light up your house when you are away.

9-- If you are going on vacation, arrange to have your lawn mowed, your paper picked-up, leaves raked and snow shoveled. Make it look like you are home.

10--Have the post office hold your mail until you return.

11-- Leave your furnace or central air on low so that people can hear it start up once in a while. This tells burglars that you won't begone for long.

12-- If you ever arrive home, and your door is open, or you see obvious signs of forced entry, DO NOT GO INSIDE, call the Police. Don't be a hero!

To keep your family safe and enjoy your life.